Don't Worry About Me

Today, while sitting at my desk, I received a message with words I never thought I would read....

"_____ decided to take her own life" (Out of respect for family and friends, I will not be releasing her name at this time). All I could do was just sit there and stare at my phone is shock and disbelief. This is someone that a year ago I was sad to see moving away from where I lived, someone that I talked to about making plans to visit one another, someone that went out of her way for others, and always had a positive outlook on things... Yet, today I was informed of her taking her own life....

I have found myself in a daze more times today and in tears almost as much, just trying to put things together..trying to understand. Then I find myself angry at me because I should have been there more. I have not talked to her in a couple months because we have each just been so freaking busy. I just feel lost and hurt. I hurt for all of us that lost her, but even more for the two precious angels she left behind. Her daughters are so young and now having to take on the loss of their mother. My words are just very limited right now. I am just heartbroken, upset, mad, and so much more. Yet with all of these, I feel a bit numb.

Regardless of her choice, I still love her and will cherish all of our memories. Her daughters will remain in my prayers...always... just as everyone affected will remain in my thoughts and prayers.

I will always remember her smiling and  positive thoughts, as well as the amazing love she had for her daughters. I just hope they grow up knowing the same thing...

I am sure that she is shining and smiling down on us now, saying "Don't worry about me".

Why did she have to go
So young I just don't know why
Things happen half the time
Without reason without rhyme
Lovely, sweet young woman
Daughter, wife and mother
Makes no sense to me
I just have to believe

She flew up to Heaven on the wings of angels
By the clouds and stars and passed where no one sees
And she walks with Jesus and her loved ones waiting
And I know she's smiling saying
Don't worry 'bout me

Loved ones she left behind
Just trying to survive
And understand the why
Feeling so lost inside
Anger shot straight at God
Then asking for His love
Empty with disbelief
Just hoping that maybe

She flew up to Heaven on the wings of angels
By the clouds and stars and passed where no one sees
And she walks with Jesus and her loved ones waiting
And I know she's smiling saying
Don't worry 'bout me

It's hard to say goodbye
Her picture in my mind
Will always be of times I'll cherish
And I won't cry 'cause

She flew up to Heaven on the wings of angels
By the clouds and stars and passed where no one sees
And she walks with Jesus and her loved ones waiting
And I know she's smiling saying
Don't worry 'bout me
Don't worry 'bout me
Don`t worry 'bout me