Here We Go Again... Another Abdominal Surgery....

This afternoon was spent at the surgeons office, to receive the official news, in which we already expected, that I DO in fact have to undergo another pelvic surgery. As most of you may know, for years I have had issues and health problems in the female region due to endometreosis and ovarian cysts. I have also had multiple surgeries on my pelvic/abdominal area. More so that any one person should ever have to go through. In October of 2008, a surgeon out here had to remove my uterus in hopes of it helping the situation. Once he removed it (which he said was the worst looking uterus he had ever seen) and cleaned the endometreosis and adhesion's out, I started feeling a little better ~ pain wise.

Not too long following the hysterectomy, the pain was back as intense as ever and the cysts kept forming and rupturing. I felt like I was fighting a losing battle. In August of 2010, the GYN department on post decided it was time to remove my ovaries. So, there we were again awaiting an oopherectomy. His plan was to remove my cervix at that time as well,  however due to the adhesion's and endometreosis that were still forming everywhere, he was unable to even get to my cervix. He let us know that I am a very complicated case and he is not qualified for it. He explained then that I would have to see a oncologist, because they have more experience in removing the cervix when it is under major complications. Looking back, I am glad he didn't even try, considering his incompetence placed me on my death bed... He was the one that did not cauterize the sites when he removed my ovaries. This left me bleeding internally and put me into kidney failure. When we went to the ER I was literally dying. Due to this, I now have permanent issues with my kidneys, went into kidney failure a second time in November, and have remained anemic, as well as many other issues. 

Since the surgery, I have felt better because I no longer have ovarian cysts. Sadly though, I still have a great amount of pain from my cervix. I was referred to Dr. Farnam ~ who is an AMAZING doctor that specializes in complicated GYN surgeries. I saw him a little over a week ago for my consult and he told me then that my cervix does indeed need to be removed. However, he did not promise it would alleviate all the issues and pain. Today he went into greater detail. What it boils down to is he will not know the severity of my situation until he has opened me up. This surgery could take thirty minutes or it could last over three hours. His goal is to remove my cervix and clean any adhesion's. If he sees that removing my cervix is too complicated from it being wrapped up in my colon, bladder, and whatever else he will have no other choice but to close me back up and schedule another surgery once I recover from this one. He was explaining that if my cervix is in too much of a complicated place, he will have to call in Dr. Gomez (my life saving surgeon last year when I went into kidney failure. If it weren't for him, I would not be here any longer). Dr. Gomez is an excellent surgeon that would work hand in hand with Dr. Farnam is needed in order to avoid bowel damages and to leave me with a colostomy bag. I love the fact that he knows what he is doing, yet is not too arrogant or does not have too much pride that he refuses to ask for assistance. If you want to look him up, his website is www.farnammd.com. Dr. Farnam also proceeded to tell me that if he could not remove my cervix, even with Dr. Gomez, then he would have no other choice than to refer me to the Mayo clinic next. Typically following this procedure, patients are sent home. With that being said, I will more than likely be kept in the hospital due to my medical problems and the complications that could arise. He is also very pissed with the incompetent doctors at Beaumont that allowed last year to happen and to see what it has done to me. Dr. Farnam also informed me that he cannot promise this will leave me pain free. Scary enough, all the damages done last year and over the last 15 years have more than likely left me with permanent pain in the pelvic and abdominal regions. He explained there is a very high chance that I will always be on pain meds and that there will be certain things I can never do or have to limit myself to...

My thoughts, well, I am scared because I have to undergo ANOTHER surgery. This makes 11 surgeries in 9 years. This makes 8 on my abdomen overall and the fourth surgery since last August, three of which have been abdominal and one spinal. While I am scared, I am also very angry and extremely tired of this. I hate the surgeries. I hate the medical problems that I have. I find myself angry a lot lately due to the fact that I can no longer have children and the ones I did have I had a real hard time carrying and they were all full of bedrest and pre-term labor, as well as other issues. I find myself wishing that I could be like many others and the reality that I can't do what others can breaks my heart. I see many take advantage of their good health, when they should be more grateful for it. Yet, through all of this, I find myself happy and beyond thankful to still be here and be alive, when I know that I shouldn't be after last year and the years prior to that. I just wish others understood that life has not been easy and I do have to fight for my health to remain stable. I have a lot more emotions to this all, but none that I am ready to share on here with everyone... At least not yet. I may be sometime very soon.....

What I ask of each of you reading, please just say a prayer for the complications to be minimal and for this to go without further dangers. As well as a prayer that I feel better from the spinal surgery I had in June very soon! We really need this to go as smooth as possible and for the recovery to go without issues. Thank you to the ones that have stayed by my side through all these health scares and issues. I would be lost without each of you. The more I know, the more I will update on here. Right now, I feel kind of at a loss for words out of the concern, fear, and pure exhaustion.

Thank you everyone!