Since yesterday afternoon into early this morning I have had something weighing so heavy on my mind and heart. Something that every time I think about it (which feels like a constant thing), the tears begin. Yesterday afternoon while I was sitting at the lab, waiting for blood work to be completed, I found out some horrible news from a close friend. She found out awhile ago that she was pregnant and this week when she went in for a sonogram they could not locate her precious baby girl's heartbeat. My heart is breaking because it seems so unfair. This is the fifth baby she has lost due to medical reasons. She does have one adorable little girl that is two now, who is the light of her life! It makes you think about all the women that can have babies with no complications and either abort them, let someone else raise them (whether it be through adoption or pawning them off on someone else), or just simply complain all the time and take it all for granted. It makes me think back to all the complications I had with my three and all the hell we went through to get them all here. How close we came to losing Bre on multiple occasions before and even a couple of times after her birth. The fact she was an emergency c-section because her heartbeat kept stopping. The fact that Bre and Nicholas were both preemies (even though Nicholas didn't have the complications or low birth weight like Breanna). Yet, through it all, I thank God all the time for these three and would do it all over again! At 25 the chance of me ever having another baby was totally taken away from me due to medical reasons. After all the health issues I have had thrown my way and the multiple times I have been told I would never have children, I am eternally grateful that I have been blessed. So, if you are one of these pregnant women that have a non-complicated, healthy pregnancy, QUIT complaining and be thankful! Stop and say a prayer that you have been blessed with something so many of us dream about! I have another friend that means the world to me that cannot seem to get a break. She has been pregnant seven times, but due to genetic problems, she does not have one that is here with her now. I went through her last pregnancy with her in 2003/2004 and it was heartbreaking to get the phone call that her baby went into cardiac arrest. Her baby that lived for three days. One that she would call me in the middle of the night just because she wanted me to hear her babies heart beat on the Doppler...... It crushed me to see my best friend go through that.
I know I am just going on and on right now, but I am upset and wish I could do something to change things. Not only for these that I have mentioned but also for friends that have gone through the still birth, friends that can't seem to get pregnant and want a baby more than anything.....
Just be thankful for the pregnancies and children you have... if you're going through a normal pregnancy suck it up and put a smile on your face. If you are tired or a little swollen, that's part of being pregnant. You should be happy if you are sick, it means your baby is healthy and your hormones are working properly. You child is getting what it needs. Just stop and think before you speak, you never know or understand what others have gone through with being pregnant or trying to get that way.
Please just say a prayer for the loss of a baby that my friend is going through. She needs as many prayers as she can get right now.....
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